Educational Resources
She Refuses to Sit on the Toilet Even With Her Diaper On, Help!

Why Do I Always Have to Remind Him to Go and Try to Poop?

Parents frequently ask me, generally in exhasperation: "Why do I always have to remind him to go into the bathroom and try to poop?" 

This question typically occurs sometime during Steps 3 and 4 of my 6 Step Treatment Program (as outlined in detail in my book), when a child is having daily bowel movements but, in many cases, only with parental reminders.

Parents generally think that, by now, their child must feel the urgency to poop, because when he does sit (and push), he almost always gets poop out. They worry that their child will become dependent on them and never learn to go to the bathroom on his own.

I tell them to be patient and not to worry.

I remind them that at this stage in treatment, their child’s rectum has not yet shrunk back to its normal size and, therefore, his ability to sense the need to poop is inconsistent, at best. The main goal at this point in treatment is for a child to have at least one large, very soft bowel movement every day, regardless of whether he does it on his own.

In the meantime, always offer a small reward for going to the bathroom without needing to be reminded. You might also ask him to tell you when is going to go try, and praise him for telling you. But try not to punish, scold, or express frustration when he does not remember.